The Germ Walk of Shame

Every Friday night my husband and I have date night. This consists of eating lots of junk food and watching Battlestar Galactica after John Patrick goes to bed. (Yes, I admit, we are sci-fi nerds.) Anyway, my job is to go to Duane Reade on the way to picking up John Patrick from daycare. This is where I get all our fattening supplies for the evening.

This particular Friday I was in quite a hurry. I quickly made my Duane Reade run, caught the bus and went to pick up John Patrick. After getting him bundled up and in his Bjorn, I loaded up. Keep in mind that I was carrying my work bag, his diaper bag, his milk cooler, and a Duane Reade bag full of junk food. In all honesty, his teacher warned me that John Patrick was going to be hungry soon. At the time I thought, “no sweat. It’s only 3 blocks to our apartment.”

After getting out on the street I realized that I didn’t have my keys. OH CRAP!! – I left my keys at Duane Reade!

As I flagged down a cab, John Patrick chose that moment to relay to me just how hungry he actually was and started wailing. I threw everything in the cab and climbed in with him in hunger fit 2008. Usually a pacifier might help this situation but of course I had none in sight. So I did something really stupid.

I immediately stuck my finger in his mouth.

Now in case you missed it – my hands at that point had been on my keys, all over Duane Reade, and worst of all (this part makes me shudder) the city bus!

After realizing this, I quickly took my diseased finger out of his mouth but the damage has been done.

So I shamefully admit that if my son turns green and grows a tail, it will be because of me and the disgusting germs I stuck in his mouth straight from the NYC transit system.





Filed under Walk of Shame

2 responses to “The Germ Walk of Shame

  1. Too funny! I can definitely relate, and shamefully say this has probably happened to me more than once. Nice Blog!

  2. Great post. I had a great visual! Leaving keys at the store is such a me move. Don’t feel too bad. The other day I did the old sticky Eliza’s binky in my mouth to clean it move. I meant to blog about it- thanks for reminding me about gross mommy moments!

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